[119] As it has pleased God in his providence to separate us at present, at some distance from each other, so that I cannot have the privilege of verbal conversation with you, I deem it not improper to hold some correspondence by means of pen and paper.

I address you, sir, as one whom I consider a friend, who I think will be willing to give advice and instruction to one who sincerely wishes it. Wishing to reveal the secrets of my heart to some friend from whom I may receive advice, I will attempt to do the same to you, being confident that you will keep whatsoever I may commit to you until you see or hear from me.

In taking a view of my past life, I will go no further back than the spring of eighteen hundred and nineteen, although I might mention feelings which I had a year before that, were they not too hard to name.

Near the commencement of the revival of nineteen my mind became impressed with the importance of the things then called in question, and well had it been for me had I then listened to the calls of the gospel, forsaken all, and followed Christ.

I was impressed with a sense of my sins; I attended meeting after meeting, but all, I fear, to no purpose until my feelings rose to such a height, that I lost all hopes of mercy, or of ever obtaining the one thing needful. Despair seized my whole soul; I concluded that I had sinned until it was too late for me to be pardoned.

I forsook all meetings, thinking that my destruction was sure, and that all the calls of mercy would sink me deeper in everlasting misery. Night after night would I lay my head on my pillow, and close my eyes in sleep, wishing that I might never more open them in that world in which I should treasure up wrath against the day of wrath, and revelation of the righteous judgment of God.

Thus I was for a number of weeks with my feelings wrought up to the summit of terror and despair indescribable; I cared not what I did. Other books were as agreeable to me as the Bible, believing that all I read in that, and all the meetings I attended and all other privileges would sink me deeper in the labyrinth of woe. My feelings were wrought up to the highest pitch of despair, and I was ready to curse the day in which I was born, if I did not in my heart really do it. But they were of short duration for this time, for in a few moments I relapsed into a state of stupidity and insensibility and concluded my case was hopeless. I wanted to pray, but I thought it would be mockery as my sins were unpardonable.

How easy it would have been for Peter, or any other man with authority from God, to have said, "Willard, repent and be baptized in the name of Jesus Christ for the remission of sins, and you shall receive the gift of the Holy Ghost, the Comforter, which shall lead you into all truth;" but instead of such a comforting declaration saluting his ears from a servant of God, he was left to believe he had committed the unpardonable sin.

This certifies that the bearer, Mr. Willard Richards, is a young man of fair moral character, and as such he is recommended in the capacity of a teacher, wherever he may find employment.

E. W. Dwight, Pastor of the Church.
Richmond, October 30, 1821.

Fasts

Sister Alice Hodgin died at Preston, September 2, 1838, and it was such a wonderful thing for a Latter-day Saint to die in England, that Elder Richards was arraigned before the mayor's court at Preston, October 3rd, charged with "killing and slaying" the said Alice, with a "black stick," and etc., but was discharged without being permitted to make his defence, as soon as it was discovered the iniquity of his accusers was about to be made manifest.

voted unanimously that Elders Woodruff and Turley go to the Potteries, Elders Taylor and Fielding to Liverpool, Elder Clark to Manchester with Elder Clayton, and Elder Richards go where the Spirit directs, and that the elders communicate with the presidency at Preston, once a month, for the time being, and Elder Richards write to Brothers Mulliner and Wright in Scotland.