The Trials of Young Joseph F. Smith (3)

The Trials of Young Joseph F. Smith (3)

Joseph's 1871 reminiscence of the trek to Utah—his hatred of C. P. Lott, desire for revenge, manhood unattained before mother's death. Except where noted, primary sources are in the Joseph F. Smith Papers.

I forgive, though I will never forget
Family myth	In early 1871 Joseph prepared a reminiscence for the Improvement Era that reveals the depth and persistence of his childhood rage. It is the beginning of a family myth—a story based on fact but serving a higher purpose—time-honored themes of persecution, exodus, and inspiration … back-stabbing, especially by "friends."	The manuscript was judiciously revised and published as "Recollections," the core of every subsequent account of Joseph F. Smith's early life.
Uncertain beginning	The narrative begins with Joseph's genealogy back to his paternal grandparents. Next, in rapid succession, his mother's conversion and move to Kirtland, marriage to Hyrum, the massacre at Carthage, Winter Quarters, and the trek to Utah. Chronologically, the next subject would be pioneer life in the Valley and Mary's death. But Joseph won't go there directly. Instead, he recalls events doubtlessly replayed hundreds of times in his mind, events associated with his feelings at the time of her death—blame and rage.	Autobiographical manuscript >.
Harlow Redfield	Backtracking to early 1839, he reports his mother took him to Liberty Jail shortly after his birth >; their home in Far West was ransacked and a mattress was thrown on top of him; he barely escaped death—events he only could have known from his mother or perhaps Aunt Mercy. But all that is prelude to a conversation he overheard between his mother and Harlow Redfield, second counselor in the Provo bishopric and a member of the Provo city council. In 1839 Redfield had been visiting the Smith home when the looters invaded.	In March 1851 Brigham Young reorganized the Provo ward with Elias H. Blackburn bishop, William Young and Harlow Redfield counselors. The following month, Redfield was elected to the first city council. Latter-day Saint Biographical 1:491; Provo, 63.
	… I well remember when in 1851 or 2 he came to Utah, he came to my mother and endeavored to explain matters, saying that he endeavored to "pick" the lock, so that the mob should not "break" it. However satisfactory this explanation was to himself, my mother could not swallow it, as she plainly told him.	Autobiographical manuscript >.
	My own opinion is that bro. Redfield was caught (as he supposed at least) in a tight place, as it seems he was at my Fathers house when the mob came, and knowing that opposition was perilous, and would be inadiquate to deter the mob from their purpose, he concluded that a quiet submission, and a seeming willingness for the mob to search the house &c. was the best policy, therefore took a part, as though he was one of the mob.
	Redfield died in the church I should like to think well of him, but this I must say, however pure his motives, my mother would never acknowledge /his explanation/ of the deed."
Forgiveness	Originally Joseph wrote "mother would never acknowledge a forgiveness of the deed," then he crossed out forgiveness and replaced it with "his explanation." Forgiveness was not lightly bestowed.	Joseph F. taught "there is no forgiveness or remission of sin without repentance."For this and other examples, see JFS: Forgiveness.
Mary's intuition Joseph's courage	After the Far West incident, Joseph proceeds to two Winter Quarters incidents in which Mary's intuition or inspiration prevents a band of rustlers from stealing her cattle >, and nine-year-old Joseph skillfully outmaneuvers a band of Indians until help arrives to save the livestock >. (The latter story is given in great detail. He was clearly proud of this achievement.)
Cornelius P. Lott	Then in the spring of 1848, desperate get her family out of Winter Quarters, Mary presses young and untrained animals into service pulling wagons. It takes three days to get to the staging ground at Elk Horn, a prohibitively slow rate of travel. At that point "a circumstance occurred I shall never forget and have not yet even forgiven >." Captain Cornelius P. Lott, to whose company they are assigned, examines their wagons and animals, and declares it is	Without referring to Lott by name, Joseph Fielding wrote only, "One said it was great Folly to attempt to go as we were fixt" >.
Go back to Winter Quarters	folly for "Widow Smith" to attempt the Journey, and said he, "Go back to Winter Quarters and remain till another year so that you can get assistance, for if you start out in this manner, you will be a burden on the company the whole way, and I will have to carry you along or leave you on the way."
I will beat you to the valley and ask no help	To this disconsolate harangue Mother calmly replied, "Father Lott, I will beat you to the valley and will ask no help from you either." At this he seemed quite nettled and said sharply, "You can't get there without help, and the burden will be on me," and turned on his heel and went away.
Joseph's reaction	I was then a little boy, and I felt greaved and hurt at the harsh and disencouraging manner of "Father Lott," and the cold rebuff he gave my mother.
"Missing" girl	Mary contracts for additional oxen, so when the company rolls out, she is ready. "All went smoothly," Joseph continues, until they reach north fork of the Platte, two-thirds of the way across Nebraska. Here they spot another company of Saints in the distance. It is the company of Jane Wilson's mother. Jane, "a subject of charity" traveling with the family leaves to join her mother, expecting the two groups will camp together that night.	Autobiographical manuscript >. Mary wrote only one letter on the trail that has been preserved. From Chimney Rock, near the western Nebraska border, she wrote her sister, Mercy, of several problems: A driver may have to return to Winter Quarters before they reach Salt Lake, Sister Grinnels "is so feeble that she cannot Cook . . . I have scarcely any Flour. . . . I have to meet trouble and perplexity with vexation where ever I go." But no mention of Lott or the troubles Joseph has described. Mary Fielding Smith to Mercy R. Thompson, July 16, 1848, Mary Fielding Smith collection.
	But Lott decides to stop at noon and calls everyone together. "Is all right in the camp?" he calls. All reply affirmatively. "When Mother spoke he exclaimed, "All is right, is it, and a poor woman lost!" Mary "very mildly" explains Jane "has gone to see her mother and is quite safe." Enraged, Lott exclaims, "I rebuke you widow Smith, in the name of the Lord! She is lost and must be sent for at once." So Joseph's older step-brother John is sent to overtake the company ahead "travelling in the night through droves of ravenous wolves." As expected, Jane is fine.
Bless the ox Joseph's focus	Next, mid-way across Wyoming, comes the blessing of the oxen. Interestingly, the crux of the story seems not to be the power of faith or priesthood, but 1) Lott's fuming about Mary's sick oxen, 2) the irony of hers being healed and his dying, and 3) Lott's suspicion that Mary or Joseph had poisoned his animals.	Ox story >.
First of three? incidents	One of our best oxen laid down in the yoak as if poisened, and all supposed he would die. Father Lott now blustered about as if the world was about at an end. "There" said he "I told you /you/ would have to be helped, and that you would be a burden on the company." But in this he was mistaken, for after praying for the ox, and pouring oil upon him he got up and we drove along only detaining the company a very short time. But we had not gon far when another fell down like the first. But with the same treatment he got up, as the other. I believe this was repeated the 3rd time, to the astonishment of all who saw and the chagrin of Father Lott.	The significance of prayer and priesthood appears in Redactions of the Joseph F. Smith Story. .> Apparently Joseph would have liked to recall three instances (for the significance of thrice repeated events see Early Mormonism, 139) but reduced it to two for "Recollections." Joseph Fielding Smith restored it to three— without qualification—but most modern retellings seem to be content with only one (Mary, 237; Presidents (Nibley), 235; Teachings of Presidents, xiv). Cousin Rachel Fielding Burton confirmed healing, blessing by Joseph Fielding >.
	Farther down the trail, one of Mary's oxen dies of old age; then three of Lott's ablest oxen and his best mule die.
Lott loses animals Insinuates poison	This was a sore trial to the old man, and a very great loss, as he was obliged to get help in order to proceed. I heard him say, "It looks Suspicious that 4 of my best animals should lie down in this manner all at once, and die, and everybody's cattle but mine escape!" and insinuated that Somebody had poisened them through Spite, all of which was said in my presence and for my especial benefit, which I perfectly understood, altho' he did not address himself directly to me.
	Now the climax:
Cost the old man dearly	It was well for Father Lott I was only a stripling of {10} /9/ years of age, and not a man. Even four years latter, Such an occurrence would have cost the old man dearly, regardless of his age, and perhaps been a cause of regret to myself.	four years: Mary died four years later (1852).
Temper beyond boiling	My temper was beyond boiling, it was "white hot," for I knew his insinuation was directed or aimed at my mother …	Autobiographical manuscript >.
Revenge Rid the earth	At this moment I resolved on revenge for this and the many other insults and abuses this old fiend had heaped upon my mother, and should most certainly have carried out my resolution had not death come timely to my releaf and rid the earth of so vile and despicable an incumbrance while I was yet a child.
Emphasis on Lott Redeem Mary's honor (revenge)	The entire trek consists of one event after another demonstrating Cornelius Lott's persistent, mean-spirited efforts to humiliate widow Smith. When he attempts to cast suspicion on her, the boy is filled with "white hot" indignation "beyond boiling." In murderous passion he resolves one day to avenge his mother of Lott's "insults and abuses"—prove his manhood by redeeming his mother's honor.
Persistent hatred	In 1860 Joseph acknowledged to his brother John, "The hardest thing for me to forgive is wraped in the memory of C. P. Lott! Yet even that I forgive, tho' I never will forget it." When, in early 1871, Joseph wrote his reminiscence, Mary and Cornelius had been in their graves over twenty years, but one senses that his rage was still "beyond boiling."	JFS to John Smith, January 20, 1861.
Lott dies	Providentially, Lott died before Joseph was old enough to act on his resolve, and all ends well—except, Joseph remembers, Lott was also spiteful of Mary because she would not allow Joseph to stand guard at night	Lott died July 6, 1850.
Joseph not allowed to perform night duty	and purforme all the duties of a man, to which she had no objections, and which I did faithfully in the day time, for I yoked, un-yoked and drove my own team and took my turn of day guard with the men, and was equal to the best, which was more than reason could demand, or than any /other/ child in camp of my age did.	Because Mary would not let him perform night duty, Joseph "was, therefore, frequently sneered at as being ‘petted by his mother,' which was a sore trial to him." "Noble Woman," 27.
Unproven manhood?	Joseph emphasizes his manly achievements, but he was still a boy. Did he resent Mary's death at some level because he had never been able to demonstrate his manhood to her?
Untimeliness of Mary's death	He does not seem to have established a meaningful relationship with Hyrum—at least not consciously. But his relationship with Mary was much more important, not only because of its duration, but because of the timing in his development. At thirteen he would have been developing a sense of self and defining his place in the world. The sudden loss of the nurturing and guidance Mary provided was catastrophic, and he the sense of incompleteness remained with him for years, if not for the rest of his life.
1891 dream of her return	For example, in July 1891, nearly forty years after her death, he dreamed Mary returned to live with him. "Oh! How blessed and happy I felt to meet her once more, and do the duty of a son to her. All her love and labors, and anxiety for my welfare in childhood came up before me, and now I had the joy of repaying her in some degree, for her life of toil." Her presence was so intensely real, "I awoke in tears and sobs of joy, only to find myself alone in my chamber and still an exile from all that I love."	JFS to Mercy R. Thompson, July 21, 1891 >.
The need to do something	This was the third time "I have seemed to met my mother since she left us," the third time he felt "impressed that something should be done but what I do not know."
Perhaps temple ordinances	Ten days later, still troubled by the dream, he wrote his Aunt Mercy to make certain Mary's temple ordinances had been properly attended to. "I have been somewhat impressed to have them done over again in one of the temples, and see if that would quiet my mind on the subject."	JFS to Mercy R. Thompson, July 31, 1891 >.
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